Travelling to the USA: A Deep Remembrance Of Who We Are.

Melbourne > LAX > Miami

I had this sinking feeling deep in my stomach for about 2 weeks before my flight travelling to the USA. This is normal for me. About 2 to 3 weeks before I leave for any trip, I start to regret booking and my mind takes over.

‘I should have stayed a little longer.’

‘I didn’t have enough time here.’

‘What if it doesn’t work out?’

‘What if I run out of money?’

‘Something might happen to Mum and Dad.’

‘I am going to regret going there.’

‘Why am I even going there? This is stupid.’

Literally, every single possibility will run through my head. I back myself with, ‘It’s going to work out,’ but each day brings a different kind of mental chaos.

I know I do this every time. That’s why I always book my flights when I get the intuitive hit and push to do so, which in this case was two months prior. Luckily for me, or I might not have gone at all.

This time felt a little different though. The usual thoughts were there, but one in particular kept taking over: ‘What if I get taken into interrogation? I can’t handle it. I’m scared.’ Each morning, I’d wake up with that pit in my stomach. Pure anxiety. I’d talk myself through it, lean on friends, breathe it out, only to wake up with the same feeling the next day.

Lucky for me, I didn’t lose sleep over it. In fact, I slept so well that I slept through my alarm on flight day and nearly missed my flight. That has never happened to me in my life. I’ve probably caught over 50 flights and never once missed one or been late.

Another story I could tell myself: ‘Maybe I’m not meant to be going.’ But I trust my intuition wholeheartedly. I know myself deeply. I know exactly what my mind is doing. So I just let it. I don’t try to fight or dismiss the feelings. They’re just trying to protect me. These parts of us are doing their thing, believing they’re keeping us safe. Maybe they did once, but now they aren’t so necessary because I trust myself. Still, we can’t just snap our fingers and expect those stories to disappear. They’re part of us. And if we can tune in deeply, we can use them for growth.

That’s what I do. I know that without struggle, there is no polarity for smooth sailing. I witness myself through the stories so I can grow. To get to the other side and say, ‘See? You made it. You’re okay.’

I’m not saying this has to be your story, but if you really look around, you might start to see that saying, ‘Tough times make strong men and easy times make soft men,’ playing out in real time.

This is all part of growth. I can now assure my body that I’ve got her. She is safe. The more I do this, the more she believes me. This is not a quick-fix scenario. This is a process of remembrance. Some people move through it faster than others. There are fears I’ve already released from my body and mind, and others I might always carry. The difference is, I’m okay with it. I don’t fear my own fears anymore. And you shouldn’t either. They’re more normal than you think.

So after speeding to the airport, missing a turn, and driving like a Formula 1 driver with my dad white-knuckling beside me in his V8, I made it. With time to spare. A lesson: maybe you don’t need to get to the airport two hours early unless you really want to. But also, don’t take my advice. You never know what awaits you at the airport. Lucky for me, it was a small line and friendly staff.

As soon as I sat down on that plane seat, got myself comfortable for the long flight, the tears started rolling in. They pretty much didn’t stop until the end of the flight. Shoutout to my eye mask for soaking up the tears so the woman in my row didn’t think someone had just died.

Here are some things I wrote on the plane during my release:

‘We are happy to sit in the uncomfortable to stay comfortable.’

‘Why are we pushing our happiness aside to feel comfortable? To stay where we are without joy, but it’s comfortable here so we will be okay.’

‘Why are we so afraid to step into discomfort but aren’t afraid to live life without joy?’

‘I always leave before the water turns to mud. I’m not afraid of the mud—just brave enough to leap before I’m drowned in it.’

‘If your body doesn’t want to buy into the fear, then follow it. It’s like we are taught to buy into fear before we are taught discernment and to choose what feels good to us.’

There was so much release once I let go of what was. A deep reminder that your environment is of the utmost importance. You might not realise it because you love your family, your friends, the people around you. But if your body is telling you otherwise, listen. It might be your environment.

I’m a highly sensitive woman. Especially being an undefined sacral and solar plexus in Human Design, I absorb the energies around me constantly. Sometimes I can release it. Sometimes I can’t, and my body takes the hit.

You might be thinking, ‘You just need better boundaries,’ or, ‘This might just be your own energy.’ I’ve heard it all. But I know myself. I’ve implemented the deepest boundaries I’ve ever had. Still, if I want to maintain a relationship with my family, which I do, then the only way is out, not in. We all have a choice.

I love my family deeply. They’re on a different path and I accept that. I accept all of it. That’s why I choose me. Every damn time. This isn’t easy. I come from a traditional Italian family. We were taught something completely different to what I’m now re-learning. This is a hard path, one I chose, and I’m proud. I’m here to show the change. That’s what matters.

The best thing I can do for myself and everyone around me is grow more into who I truly am. To embody what I believe in and live my path guided by intuition, surrender, grace and God. I feel the difference instantly. So do they, even if they’re not aware of it.

Between the tears, the pit in my stomach remained. I knew. I knew I was going in. It didn’t matter how hard I manifested, how much light I put around my body, how many rituals I did. My path was to go into that interrogation room, and you’ll soon find out why. There’s always a why. Always.

You might not see it straight away. You might see it a year later. There’s no timeline for when it clicks - but trust me, it always does.

Some people might say, ‘What’s the big deal?’ I knew I would get through, but I didn’t know how. There’s always a shadow of doubt. There’s so much fear in the media around the US borders. Maybe it’s true, maybe not. But it worked on me. And in I went.

I was taken to the detained area for questioning. There were all kinds of people in there. People like me, people with criminal records, people clearly trying to give birth in the US for citizenship. I understood why the borders are strict. People are seeking safety, and I get it. But of course, I was going to be questioned.

I messaged my best friend who was waiting for me: ‘I’m getting interviewed.’ That was the last she heard from me for 2 hours.

After about 30 minutes, I started to calm down. I wasn’t afraid anymore. I surrendered to whatever will be.

They didn’t call me for questioning for over an hour. Others who came in after me went ahead. I believe they do this to build anxiety, but it had the opposite effect.

I played out what I would say in my head a thousand times. But when you get in there, that all goes out the window. You speak what comes through. And when it's the truth, there's nothing to fear.

I got called up. By that point, I was exhausted. 15-hour flight. No sleep. Missed my connecting flight to Miami. Delusional. At first, I stumbled, but by the end, I felt like a little girl ready to take on the world. Why? Because I was telling my truth, and that’s all that mattered.

The officer questioning me was kind. He was testing, but never rude or dismissive. I felt safe with him. Of course he is, that’s the energy I attract. We ended up laughing, even flirting a little. By the end, we were friends.

He just wanted the truth. That I wasn’t there to work illegally or stay forever. And I wasn’t. I was honest. At one point, I told him, ‘All I do is wake up, go for a walk, get my matcha, go to the beach, and have deep chats with my friend. That’s my life right now.’ He laughed and said, ‘I believe you 60 percent. Convince me of the other 40.’ But it was the truth.

After back and forth, looking at bank accounts, talking about online businesses and giving everyone in that room a lesson on selling online, he handed me my passport and said 'good luck'.

By the end, he looked me straight in the eye and said, ‘While you’re here, build that ecomm business to a million-dollar brand. It has the potential.’

Side note for those that want to know why I was called in. I have travelled to the USA 3 times in the 12 months. I was automatically flagged and it didn't matter which airport I went to, I was going to get questioned. Generally, you should have 6 months in-between trips. Mine were not. I also was staying for 6 months, for no major reason other than travelling, that's a red flag too.

And there it was. That was the why. A complete stranger, after an hour of interrogation, gave me the words I didn’t know I needed. He saw something I was still doubting in myself.

But I gave him something too. He told me he used to have an ecomm store but it didn’t work out. He felt stuck. I told him maybe this was why we met. Maybe he needed to hear this today. I know something shifted in him. I felt it.

If I have to go through deep discomfort so others can grow, then my purpose is fulfilled. I’ll do it again and again. If a little suffering sparks growth for someone else, that’s success to me. That’s why I came here.

My greatest gift is your growth. Whether you see it or not. If anything I do helps you remember who the fuck you are, that’s enough. If my growth helps yours, and yours helps mine, isn’t that what this is all about?

We are here walking each other home to remembrance. What a gift. A profoundly beautiful gift we all hold in our hearts.

I’ll never forget this leap. I stepped from one timeline to another. I faced obstacles and fears that could have stopped me. I didn’t stop. I chose truth. I chose God. And now I’m here to share this story.

Never forget who you are.

Never give up on the path that lights your heart.

Listen to your intuition. Listen to that gut feeling. Listen to God, however you hear the message.

Remember who the fuck you are.

P.s I did miss my flight, but I didn't panic. I walked over to the American Airlines counter (still delusional) and I told them what happend. I had a slip from the interrogation office and so they put me on the next flight, which was in 1 hour. How great. Of course it worked out. But a reminder, if this ever happens to you it's pretty easy to get on another flight, just make sure you tell the office that you missed your flight and they will give you a slip to give to the airline.

Adelina xo

The moment before I was taken into interrogation at LAX.

Created by AI: A goddess travelling through realms, following her path of deep remembrance.